Monday, 28 December 2009

Wonder and delight

Oooh,this month has been...hectic. Notice I didn't keep my appointment for the 18th? I was travelling (and I hate scheduling posts - probably have done it just once already). Anyway, I was on the way to Jamaica and once I got here, it got even crazier.

However, all that was with good reason. Busy planning the 40th anniversary celebration for my parents; busy executing the plans; busy attending and participating, but all with pleasure.

And they loved it! And that just makes my day. My sisters and I are glad that they enjoyed it - as did the friends who were invited. But, I think my parents enjoyed it more. They did the whole renewal of vows and exchange of rings - and this time, I was there! That was touching.

I'm mos def looking forward to the new year! It will be wonderful and delightful and exciting and my dreams will come true.



Tuesday, 8 December 2009

Heads-up! We’re bottoming out.

Are we getting too low for comfort? Well, it seems that those who are getting that low (IMO), are clearly comfortable with it. Perhaps, in that thought process, it’s not a measure or judgment of “low-ness” or fnoabw, depth. It may well be, perhaps, simply a matter of a new territory. There’s no hole being dug, no ladder being climbed. It’s just …virgin territory.

We live on a planet that has become tough, cynical, insatiable, impatient, (instant-coffee-is-too-slow), with numerous persons walking around individually-wrapped in a very real fear of being lost in the crowd. So, what do they do? Try – even if it means being egregious – to stand out from the other six billion plus people.

At one point or another, most people have pondered the why-am-I-here? question. And, along the continuum of that thought, may come the will-I-be-missed-when-I’m-gone? question. So, somewhere in-between, you try to “do something” that will attest to the fact that you were here, and hope that that “something” is the purpose for which you were placed here. (“Hope is not a method” as the General’s book is so aptly titled. But that’s for another time.)

Now, my question is: Does that “something” that you do to distinguish you from every other human being before, during and after your presence here have to be as obtuse as tweeting to the social media community at the very moment that you are doing something as serious as, say, being pronounced husband to your new wife? Hmm? Seems like some are willing to do whatever it takes to make some record or the other. Doesn’t matter which one. Just have history recording that, “I was the first to …”

You know what’s scary? The kinds of stunts that this guy’s protégés are going to pull to try to top that.

I’d say we’re bottoming out – and, where is the bottom, anyway?


Saturday, 28 November 2009

Wednesday, 18 November 2009

I can do this

It’s kind of hard to believe, but, I’m winding down to my personal deadline as I wind up preparations for the application package. Ah! English.

All I need to do now is deconstruct all I’ve come to know about writing resumés, try to make sense of it all and learn about writing a curriculum vitae (the course of one’s life – in this case, the course of my life!)

It has been quite a task – partly because I’m kinda anal and partly because, well, quality preparation – especially for a Ph.D. application package – does take work!

So, carry on I shall. This has to be in by Monday! (I am actually trying to submit it by Friday – nuff time to spare before the December 1 deadline.) There goes another weekend, but, I know it will be worth it in the not-so-long run. I try to keep my focus and energy up by envisioning the words along the lines of: “…are pleased to let you know that you have been accepted to the Ph.D. program…”

I can do this I can do this I can do this – especially through Christ who strengthens me.


Monday, 9 November 2009

Here's to you, Mommy and Daddy

Okay. Here’s the thing: I’d like to continue writing on the 8s, but, my Internet connection at home has gone funky. And it’s not like me to have an entry-in-waiting. I prefer to write on d-day.

So, the deal is that I shall still try to honour the commitment to the 8s. But, if I miss by a day or two – depending on whether it falls on a Sat. or Sun. – I’ll make every effort to make up for it on the earliest work day after that.

Yesterday (Nov.) was an absolutely lovely day weather wise and otherwise. My youngest sis and me had an impromptu dinner and a (home) movie. It was a sunny 16C and I enjoyed every minute of it. Well, except for the part where I had to do laundry – I hate doing the laundry, man! At the end, though, it felt good to have it all done and be stacked with clean clothes again. 

Last week, a number of milestone events happened. I got the first draft of the Statement of Intent done and sent it off for review by a couple of my former professors. That was a big deal for me – one of the few pieces of academic writing since I completed my Masters, but the one with the most weight, to date.

Also, (drum rrrrooooollll), my parents celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary on the 5th. Zowie! No big mystery to the longevity of their marriage, though. I’m incredibly happy for and proud of them. God has really blessed them with everything needed to make theirs a long, lesson-filled, strong and good relationship and they’ve used it. They’re friends. And they’ve raised us within that circle of love and trust. They’re our friends and we are theirs, too.

Here’s to you, Mommy and Daddy, with lots of love!


Wednesday, 28 October 2009

The Blank Page

One of the scariest things to a writer is, yeah, you guessed it: the blank page.

Today, instead of being scared, I'm simply going to wait until I have something meaningful to say.

How's that?


Friday, 23 October 2009

She's just happy to be alive!

The last few days have been jam-packed with activity; with wonder and delight!

Missed the appointment on the 18th - even though I'd even set an alert this time around. I just knew it was gonna be needed. And for all that, my heightened engagement in the day's activities led to my date with my blog.

And I would've done it all over.

My niece celebrated...make that we celebrated my niece's 1st birthday and I just had to be there. Partly for my niece whom I haven't seen in 10 months and mainly for my sister who, (as we'd guessed) would've been equally surprised and appreciative of my being there.

For months, all of us were together and then, by the summer, we'd all taken off to our different "callings" and left her "alone". So, we - parents and other siblings - all kept my visit secret, until the day before. She couldn't believe it when I told her I was making the trip to Jamaica to celebrate the joyous occasion with her. On B-day, the family, along with a few close friends, made it a wonderful and memorable afternoon.

My niece? Oh, she showed such appreciation for the gifts she received. Albeit, as we took one from her clutches, we had to quickly replace it with the next. And, there she was, appreciating and discovering the new gift.

I remember something that my sis said a few months ago when she sent pics of her waking up. (Yes, you read that right.) "She wakes up with a smile and such energy every morning. I guess she's just happy to be alive!"

I love that.


Thursday, 8 October 2009

The Right Stuff

Made a sharp intake of breath just now. Remember that show? Anyway, it’s getting toward the end of another nice day and my eyes are tired. My tummy is, ok, admittedly full. But, it’s with all nutritious stuff.

I’ve gone veggies and fish for a year. (Not sure whether I’d mentioned that before and it’d take me time that I don’t have now to check through the archive.) So, I’m making that extra effort to take in the right stuff. (Great article by Dr. Vendryes here, btw.)

Ever since my early teens, I made the decision to stay away from gravy and sauce and the like. I’m not a fan of beef (except in Jamaican Beef Patties), like fish and chicken, and (not: but) I do love pork. Moreover, I absolutely enjoy fruits and most veggies!

So, this new diet since January 1, 2009 hasn’t been that difficult to maintain. The ‘extra’ in the “extra effort”, really has to do with the sweet-tooth part of it.

Sure, now and again I indulge in a little ice-cream. Gotta tell you though, if I’m gonna do that, I make it rich!

Nuff said.


Tuesday, 29 September 2009

On a new path

This is cool, isn’t it? 29-09-2009.

A bit off from the 8s, but for a cool-looking cause, I imagine.

I took a new PATH yesterday. Left work about an hour later than usual and figured, since I was already behind my daily schedule, I’d go on the adventure. I’d oft heard about the PATH from Yonge and Dundas to Union Station. Heck. Even tried it several times from Union, but kept getting out still too far south of my workplace. In any case, I’d kept it up until this past summer, when I discovered that the above-ground route was about 10-15 minutes shorter. And that’s not because I stopped in at the shops along the PATH! (They really thought that one through, eh?)

Gotta tell you, though. It was really a maze! But, I kept reminded myself of one of my mantras: "Thank God for my mother who taught me how to read." About 40 minutes later, I saw the sign: Union Station. I couldn't help but smile out loud, thinking: "I did it!" That made me think of another journey...

I started on a new path yesterday. I’ve made the first (baby) steps to completing a Ph.D. program at the University of Toronto. The designation would be Ph.D in Education. The area of emphasis – all being well – would be Workplace Learning and Social Change. And when I say, “baby steps”, that’s exactly what I mean.

I’ve prayed – well, prayed without ceasing, it would seem – about it. The decision has come after much thinking. I’ve finally decided that it is time for me to re-enter the world of academia and scholarly thought; create knowledge and add to the conversation in a meaningful way. So, I called up the registrar of the Ontario Institute for Studies in Education (OISE) for a few tid-bits of info (but mainly, to talk to a ‘live’ person). I drafted my request for reference letter to send to Professors Andersen and Kowal at SUNY Brockport. And, I am now set to copy my ‘superior papers’ to attach to my request – to kinda jog their memory, you know? As I told my lil sis yesterday, I don’t think they’d find it hard to remember me. (She chuckled.) AND, it’s not because I stood out for bad reasons. No, I was an ‘A’ student and one of the few Teaching Assistants that the Communication Department engages each years. AND, I was re-appointed for my second year – even more unusual!

So, there you have it. I’m on my new path. Even the baby steps count. Just ask Keona!



Friday, 18 September 2009

Once it's out there...

Made a comment about the story of the children in the UK who voted 13:1 to have the lamb they had raised and hand-fed, slaughtered. The blog was carried in the Ottawa Citizen of 9-14-2009 (my comment at 4:12p.m., 9-16-2009). I hardly ever comment on blogs - I suspect this might have been about my second ever blog comment. I don't even remember the first, but, I wanna cut myself some slack - "just in cases." Usually, I just read blogs, and maybe a few of their responses, and move on. 'Cause, you know, once you get involved and put things out there - for any and everyone to see, well, it's out there. And, if there are comments about your comments, yours is the decision to deal with them - or not - and how to, if you decide to.

Anyway, in this case, however, I found both story - and comments - rather enlightening.

A copy of my own comment follows:

Not sure why my first submission didn't go through, but, here's the 2nd attempt:

My sentiments became rather mixed as I read on and on. They moved from:

LOL! - in response to the brouhaha of the activists juxtaposed with the quiet and firm decision made by the children to

OMG! These children are scary - from hand-fed "Good boy, Marcus eat up. Nice lambie," to "OK, Marcus, we're gonna have you killed now" to

OK, would the activists have to come out again after the purchase of pigs? to

Hmmm. A quiet realization that in this age of a rather irreverent treatment of many things once held almost sacred, (generally speaking now), it helps to be prepared for stuff that might otherwise conflict with our sensibility.

On some levels, this does affect our sensibility – as bigdaveinchina so aptly articulates. I too would not want to “lose too much.”

My dad was a pig farmer a long time ago. We also, later on in life, raised chickens. As a little girl into my teens, I’d witness, then get involved in, the raising and killing of chickens. For some reason, however, when we got to raising goats, we simply would not have them killed for meals. My parents got a kick out of the fact that they had to sell the goats then use the money to buy goat meat (mutton) from a butcher to prepare our meals. To this day, almost 20 years later, when we raise the occasional goat(s), he still has to do the same thing.

I'm now living in Canada and as I’m writing this now, I shake my head in wonder. What made it different for us to accept the cute, soft baby chicks growing into ready-to-eat chickens over the met-from-birth kids growing into frolicking goats? Was it because they were more …and here’s a term we didn’t use then…interactive? I dunno. Visitors to our home would suggest that our rabbits gave “good meats” as well, but, we would hear none of it. We had got accustomed to petting and playing with them all the time. I just knew we – as children – decided to kill and eat the chickens and we – as children – decided not to kill and eat the goats.

If this is being done for educational purposes, then, surely, as a few others have posted, complete the process (from the womb to the tomb). I rather doubt that any of those children who voted to have the sheep slaughtered would have made a similar decision, had s/he raised the animal as a pet at home.

Well, I hope not.


Tuesday, 8 September 2009

Deconstructing the deletion: In defense of the decison to discontinue the inadvertent "stalking"

So, I’ve been doing the Facebook thing for about 2-3 years – it’s all a blur. I think it was in about April or May this year that I posted a message on my wall, stteo: I’ll be taking a break from fb, until I appoint my FAM (facebook Account Manager). I’ve popped in a couple times - doing nothing to write home about, really.

At some point, I began receiving messages in my Hotmail account from friends wanting me to send a friend request. Of course, I didn’t remember that I’d adjusted my settings to remove the FR link. But, that’s beside the point. It took me a while to respond to one of them – that of a very dear friend – ‘cause, well, our friendship exists outside of fb! Come Labour Day, with a bit more time on my hands, by the time I was to respond to her, I saw another request from someone else. It’s been years upon years that that person and I have had dialogue, but, I decided to send the FR anyway. In both instances, I let them know that I don’t use fb often and, in the event they don’t see me on it after a while, no worries. They have my contact info.

As a matter of fact, being now in ‘da mood’, I decided to take stock. Whom did I have on the Friends list that, well, hmmm …you know? I mean, since accepting the friend request 2 or more years ago, we hadn’t even exchanged a hello. So, after posting to my wall, stteo: I’ll be deleting a few contacts from my list ‘cause we don’t talk, really, and when I do pop in to fb, I feel like I’m stalking you… I went ahead and did just that.

My sis called to let me know that one of those who’d remained responded to my message. Something about the possibility of those affected not liking it. Oh well. As my other sis said, at least I gave a heads-up. Others simply go right ahead and delete – no compunction, no angst – just delete.

And it’s not that I think fb is evil or anything. I just don’t see the sense in looking at and absorbing what’s happening in the lives of others. It’s like watching a long-running (so-called) reality TV show. While they’re living their commercial-ridden lives, you’re spending yours watching them living their lives.

The point of the class reunion now would be what, exactly? Oh! Fewer pics that would make for a less bulky wallet and, of course, you get to see your friends ‘live’.

While having a truly enjoyable time at my lil sis’ place over the long weekend, she showed me a particularly funny youtube vid about the possible effect of fb on relationships. Apparently, there are those who regard fb to be more than a social networking site and whatever happens on fb, doesn’t stay on fb, but impacts (heavily) on the real-world relationships.

As we say in our family sometimes, “This isn’t funny ‘ha ha’; it’s funny ‘peculiar’.”

Who knows? A few of those I’d let remain might decide to remove me as a friend.

Oh well.


Friday, 28 August 2009

In place of the writing

Do you know what today is? Today is the one-year anniversary of this blog. Hm. Feelin’ pretty good about that, actually. It has been a labour of…well, not so much love as desire for continuity, stick-to-it-edness and longevity.

I do love to write, don’t get me wrong. It’s just that I do it more in a personal space (read: Journal) than anywhere else. Having stuck with this blog for a year now, I believe I’ve move past writing it being a “great idea” to the writing itself.

The good thing is that I’ve kept it true to what I wanted. It’s about anything I wish to write. No scrutiny, no critique, no evaluation. S’just what I want to say on whatever subject I want to say it.

Of course, I can hardly mark the anniversary without mentioning the inspiration that jolted me last year; the shot in the arm, if you will. It was the inspiring achievements that the Jamaican athletes made at the 29th Olympiad held in Beijing last year. The likes of Shelly Ann Fraser, Usain Bolt, Asafa Powell, Veronica Campbell Brown, Kerron Stewart and the other team members, made our hearts swell. And, for some, like myself, spurred us into action. This year at the 12th IAAF World Championships held in Berlin, they were at it again. A year to the date, Bolt broke the 100M record he set in Beijing - 9.69s to 9.58s and on the anniversary of the 200M, he broke that one as well – 19.30s to 19.19s.

Like many people, I do think now and then about my legacy. What would I have left for longevity to be remembered by; to benefit my loved ones, long after they bury me?

A few things come to mind – none takes the place of the writing.


Tuesday, 18 August 2009

Of best days and inspiration

Got up this morning believing that today was going to be one of the best days of my life!

And it was!

Did anything spectacular happen? Well, that depends on how you (say it with me) define spectacular. Actually, a few wonderful miracles came my way. And, I guess, sometimes you ought to just stop and count them there blessings.

- I got a very cheap fare to visit with family in October, GW. It's a surprise for my sis and her family (in celebration of my niece's first birthday)! My other siblings know about it - and I'll mention it to our parents later on. In the meantime, just hoping I say or do nothing to give it away in all my anticipation. Tee hee.

- Shone at an interview tonight for a volunteer position for which I applied last week. It's for a Board Director position with a community organization. Here's hoping I get the position.

- I heard from "Cupid" and believe that he conveyed my number. I'm expecting a call :)

- A year to the date on Sunday, and then yesterday, Usain Bolt and Shelly-Ann Fraser gave inspiring performances at the 12th IAAF World Championships in Athletics in Berlin, Germany. Bolt with his scintillating 9.58 in the 100M men's and Fraser with her glorious 10.73 in the women's 100M.

Inspiration reigns.


Saturday, 8 August 2009

"People need people..."

I came across a lovely story several years ago. It was a gentleman's account of his five year-old daughter asking him to help her undress. He was quick to remind her that she could do that by herself. Her response has stuck with me, even after so long: "Yes, Daddy but, people need people. Even when they can do things by theirselves" [sic].

True dat. People need people. And, well, people need to be needed.


Tuesday, 28 July 2009

"Invention is the mother of necessities."

So says the Mc man (Marshall McLuhan, that is). Of course, I simply shake my head in sombre agreement as I battle it out with the Norton Utilities 14 I just installed on my laptop.

Not funny. It won't even load.

There goes my night... I imagine I may very well be at this 'til the wee hours of morning.



Saturday, 18 July 2009

Ch ch ch changes

Lots of changes this week - new place, new wheels.

It feels, and is great to enjoy Divine favour!

Hm. Feels like I'm closer Home.


Wednesday, 8 July 2009


Yesterday was the day of the memorial service held in honour of Michael Jackson. The service was held at the Staples Center in "The City of Angels", Califor-ni-a, but attended by millions around the world - thanks to the Internet and a host of insatiable media.

"Communal sorrow is moving," a New York Times writer scripted in a column yesterday. Nicely put.

The "This is It" tour that never was, seemed to have metamorphosed into a last staging. Even though others performed and spoke, in death, Michael was still the star of the event. As huge as he was, he remains dead. His music, however, will live in the hearts of millions for generations to come.

I hope that it serves to inspire others to do and give their very best. That's what I'll miss most - for a while, I imagine - his being around giving of his best in his performance.

Marshall McLuhan said the medium is the message/massage. There is definitely, in many quarters, a not-so-latent loathing of, or disgust with, the cruel, scathing (especially USA) media that gave him hell for the past 20 or so years, and in recent days somehow seemed bent on having a ratings feeding frenzy at the late entertainer's and family's expense? Ugh! What would you expect from a hog but a grunt? The way they were carrying on, you'd never believe it was the same set of media houses. Still, the message of the masses was too great to ignore. They refused to collectively hear or speak anything that would detract from the man, his music and his message. The media simply had to hitch a ride on the bandwagon - if they knew what was good for them.

Apparently, they did.


Sunday, 28 June 2009

Secret admiration

The world feels different without Michael Jackson. I get up on a morning and, as soon as my thoughts turn to him, the world just...feels different. I'd never met him; never talked to him or wrote to him or even bought his record, tape, CD or DVD. Yet, he was just always there, with me listening and watching and admiring his brilliance, talent and commitment from afar.

I started taking notice as I ventured into my teens and, well, he was just always there, giving the best of himself when he performed. It seemed to make him happy when he made his listeners happy. There was an unmistakable cord of desire to connect with them. With us. He wove something strong and satisfying through music and dance and in every performance, he wrapped millions in this something. And each time was the best of times.

And, when that pure, unselfish offering of oneself is no longer, a hole forms where that substance once was. The world really feels different without him.

Even though there were no plans to meet up with him, he was somewhere on the planet - within reach. Now, no longer. And that is the stark reality that's still a tad too real.

It saddens me that he is no longer here. Still, I'm thankful to God for the time that He allowed him to spend here. Nobody's perfect; he wasn't. I could not venture into that realm. But, he gave the best of himself.

The outpouring of warm, tender and other sentiments continues. I'm sure he knew that he was loved by those who loved him.

In the end, I want it to be said, truthfully, that I gave the best of myself.

Oh, it might've come down to "Will you be there?"



Thursday, 25 June 2009

He made the world a happier place

Michael Jackson is no longer with us. He suffered a cardiac arrest today and very soon after, at 2:26PM Pacific Time, he was no more.

When he was not performing, he seemed to give not much at all. When he performed, he seemed to give everything.

I thank God for the time that He allowed him to spend here on earth. He made the world a happier place.

Yet to determine my all time fav Michael Jackson song - didn't think I'd have to think about that within a context such as this and so soon.

"It's the most honest song I've ever written. It's the one [Childhood] you should listen to."
- Michael Jackson (1958 - 2009)


Thursday, 18 June 2009

Second chances

Ever felt like you've made a nincompoop of yourself in the presence of people on whom you really should be making a good impression and the moment it happens you feel the blood rush to your face and your eyes feel all heavy-like and you kinda do that bit of nervous chuckle and you know nobody gets it - especially you! - and you just hope that someone will, sometime in this inordinately long time (which only feels long but it's really been three seconds) come to your rescue?

Then, someone does.

Had one of those moments today. Can you tell? What's that about only a first chance to make a good impression?

After replaying the moment for the umpteenth time, I've decided to (try harder to) let it go. Lessons learned. Inhale. Exhale. I mean, after all, tomorrow is another day. I may get an opportunity to say and/or do something that's sheer genius! I'll make sure to grab it.

And that's how I look forward to, and prepare for, my second chance to make a great impression.


Monday, 8 June 2009

Of two loves

How do you say goodbye, when you didn't even have a chance to say goodbye?

My friend had married her high school sweetheart (though he was from a different high school). They were together for almost 20 years. He passed away last week. Suddenly. First there was the pain, then, it seems like right after, the passing.

She called him her "beautiful husband."

I phoned a mutual friend to give her the numbers. She'd been crying. It was a terribly hard decision to put Ebony down. For 16 years, her cocker spaniel had given her much joy.

It didn't help that she had a chance to say goodbye.


Thursday, 28 May 2009

Adventures of the hair kind

"Don't mess too much with your hair, for by the time you're 40, it'll look 85."

Remember that quote from the piece I've affectionately titled, "Everybody's Free to Wear Sunscreen"? Well, I've never been one to "mess too much" with my hair. Had a temp burgundy-ish rinse in once, but nothing more than the occasional braid. (And, when I was much younger, I'd had it in a boy-ish low cut.) In sporting my relaxed coif, though, I just don't do stuff with it or to it. Not out of fear that anything would go awry. Just...not into adventures of the hair kind.

Until now.

I'm actually thinking seriously about relaxing it (ho-hum) and coloring it (sunset red with streaks of copper) and cutting it (any style would fit - I have that kinda face).

If and when I do get all that done, I s'pose I should post a pic for proof.

Hm. OK. So, maybe I should think seriously about thinking seriously about it...and take it from there.

Cold feet? Perhaps a tad chilly.


Monday, 18 May 2009

The small stuff

Listening to Tracy (as in Chapman), usually makes me think of dying. Whether it's up tempo or molasses-esque; done to music or a capella, there's a feeling of urgency cradled in sense of "so little time."

Guess to each her own, eh? For some, for example, Joni Mitchell takes them to a certain place of shadows and other-self consciousness.

Anyway, I think that's important, you know? Every once in a while, we should think about how frail we are; how ...transient.

It keeps the small stuff small.


Saturday, 9 May 2009

The ninth month


Did I really miss my date yesterday? I try to post on the days with 8 in them. Somehow, I missed the date for the post on the 8th. This, in my 9th month of posting. I guess it's just fitting, then, that I do it on the 9th day.

I heard that 8 is the number that signifies new beginnings (as opposed to...?) Anyway, that's why I chose to post and publish on the 8s - even bearing the time in mind.

The latest and greatest? Where do I begin? I've been asked to speak at a Mothers' Day service. Mos def looking forward to that. I feel, 'ow you say? Right on track. And that's one of the best feelings in the world.

This just in - this week, at any rate: I was recommended for a new position in a Branch that, like, totally has my name on it. Hmm. This feels so good.

I'm pumped! I'm psyched! I'm on the way ...home!

Sydney Bristow was right. "There's no drug like adrenaline."

(Btw, I love ALIAS. Got all 5 seasons in my Rambaldi box. But, am I the only one that finds Wikipedia's provision of extensive biographical info on fictional characters both cool and disturbing at the same time? Hmm?)


Tuesday, 28 April 2009

Da Mood

Oh God, I’m not in the mood. I’m not in the mood. I’m soooo not in the mood. Here’s this fellow telling me that they had to edit my quote due to space constraints, not realizing (?) / apologizing for the fact that the edited version totally changed the meaning. If I go ahead and respond in pointing that out, it mightn’t go over as it should – even though it may be as I would want it to.
Bought a scarf today. It’s 100% Rayon (by-product of wood she said) made in India. It’s gor-jas! Ahhh! Just took a glance at it. Now I know why it excites me so. It’s a mix of the sunset colours I see from my window at TNH. Like the little girl said, “Dear God, I didn’t know that orange went with purple until I saw Your sunset. Cool!” Yup. It’s predominantly purple (I like that – p p ) with tinges of orange – dark and light – blended in as pseudo-embroidery on the fringes and woven in with the purple in the middle. It looks so lovely on me; brings out my warm red undertone and complements my chocolat skin. OK then.


Saturday, 18 April 2009

Things of beauty

Some days are things of beauty. I've come to realize that there are no bad days. There are good days, better days and "one of the best days of my life!" days.

Thursday was one of the best days of my life.
Friday was one of the best days of my life.
Today was a better day.

Hm. I wonder what tomorrow will be?

My life being spared, I look forward to getting my heart's desires. Mmhmmm.


Wednesday, 8 April 2009


When you can't breathe, it's all you think about.

What's like oxygen to you? What is it that you just gotta do? What is it that, if you don't do it, you feel like you're gonna just curl up in a corner and die a slow, painful death?

And the not doing it, kills you slowly but precisely.

Sometimes you have to drop what you're doing to do what you have to. Don't think, just do it.

Are you suffocating here?

At the first chance, no matter how small, BREATHE!


Saturday, 28 March 2009

Earth Hour Power, Baby!

Earth Hour, 8:30pm - 9:30pm. It's now 8:45pm, EST. So, how does Earth look from the window of an airplane right about now? I've been wondering about that. No pic of that yet from the TV stations I've been surfing. Ah well.

My lights are off - save for the tiny night light, for my cat. Really.

There have been a few pics of iconic landmarks that are hardly distinguishable at the moment - CN Tower, TO, Ontario; Times Square, NY, New York; Pyramids in Egypt...

Sooo, the significance of this move[ment]? Collectively, the world can save a mind-boggling amount of energy/power in an hour. (Figures will flow post-event, no doubt.) I'm pretty sure the question has been asked time and again. How about doing this more often?

Ah. A friend of mine had a saying, "Used to is a heck of a thing, eh?" That's just it, really. We've become used to using far more than we need.

But, no need to spell out all of that. Let's just do what we can on a personal and daily level to help save energy.

This just in from CBC: Toronto Hydro reporting that in 25 mins, 12.6% drop in energy use in TO alone. Last year, an 8% drop in the entire hour! Way to go, TO!!!

Well, lemme save even more energy by shutting down this computer. I'm not afraid of the dark :) As is written, even the darkness shall be light about me...

8:58PM EST


Wednesday, 18 March 2009

I paint my toenails blue

I don't have many vices. Well, from what I recall of Chaucer's The Pardoner's Prologue and Tale, the seven vices named were, like, huge, right?

There are a few things in which I like to indulge that may come as a surprise to very many. Still, at least a few people know of my penchant for, say, painting my toenails blue!!!

And, truth be told, it's not only my toenails, but my fingernails as well; and it's not just any blue. It's royal blue. So, there!

The other proclivities? Well, wouldn't you like to know?


Sunday, 8 March 2009

I Need You Now

Oh, it's been so long since I've written a song. But, from the recesses of the heart came this one a few days ago.

I Need You Now

Verse 1
Oh God I don't even know where to begin
I could try from where I'm sitting
Beside this rubble of my broken dreams
It's the sum of my life and so many things are missing.
And whatever I say to You now
I've poured out ten times before
How will it be different? What is the point?
I'm not strong enough to do this anymore.

1st Cho
They tell me to keep trusting You
And I'm tryyyyying
But I feel that my faith is getting weak
How much longer do You want me to hold
Without seeing the promised change that I seek
My hands are slipping
My hope is fading
My heart is tearing up inside
I need You now
Only You and You alone
Can help me now.

Verse 2
Oh God my life is in Your loving hands
You are holding my heart and You care
In the core of my being I know better
Than to think that You are not here.
But, there are mornings when I awake Lord
And it still seems like the darkest hour
And I hold Your word to my bosom
You have given me the spirit of power.

Rept. 1st Cho

They tell me to keep trusting You
And I'm tryyyyying
But I feel that my faith is getting weak
How much longer do You want me to hold
Without seeing the promised change that I seek
My hands are slipping
My hope is fading
My heart is tearing up inside
I need You now
Only You and You alone
Can help me now.

Oh God, You are my Strength
You are my Song and my Salvation
You will never put me to shame for trusting You
You will never, ever, ever leave nor forsake me
You use the things which are not
To bring to nought the things that are
That no flesh should glory in Your presence!!!!!!!!!!!

2nd Cho
They tell me to keep trusting You
And I'm tryyyyying
Now I feel my faith's no longer weak
It's not much longer that You want me to hold
I can see the change You promised me
My hands are in Your hands
My hope is rising
My heart is mending with Your peace (smiling with your peace)
You are here now
Only You and You alone
Could help me now.


Saturday, 28 February 2009

What is the question?

To spay or not to spay.

That is the question.

Trying to decide whether it's the ...right thing (no quotation marks) to do for my indoors-only cat.



Wednesday, 18 February 2009

When God wants a man

I heard this poem on Charles Price's program, Living Truth, on Sunday. My search of the net yielded the copy below. If you are, or know, the author, I'd be happy to give credit or remove it from my blog, as requested.

In the meantime, here goes something powerful.


"When God wants to drill a man and thrill a man and skill a man...
When God wants to mold a man to play the noblest part;
When He yearns with all His heart to create so great and bold a man that all the world shall praise...
Watch His methods;
Watch His ways!

How He ruthlessly perfects whom He royally elects...
How He hammers him and hurts him,
And with mighty blows converts him
Into frail shapes of clay that only God understands. How his tortured heart is crying and he lifts beseeching hands...
How he bends but never breaks when His good he undertakes.
How He uses whom He chooses...with every purpose fuses him;
By every art induces him to try His splendour out...
God knows what He's about!

When God wants to take a man and shake a man and wake a man...
When God wants to make a man to do the future’s will;
He tries with all His skill...
When He yearns with all His soul to create him large and whole...
With what cunning He prepares him...
How He goads and never spares him! How He whets him and He frets him and in poverty begets him...
How often He disappoints whom He sacredly anoints!
With what wisdom He will hide him;
Never minding what betide him...
Though his genius sob with slighting and his pride may not forget;
Bids him struggle harder yet!
Makes him lonely so that only God's high messages shall reach him...
So that He may surely teach him what the hierarchy planned;
And though he may not understand...
Gives him passions to command.
How remorselessly He spurs him...
With terrific ardour stirs him
When He poignantly prefers him.

When God wants to name a man and fame a man and tame a man...
When God wants to shame a man to do His Heavenly best;
When He tries the highest test that His reckoning may bring...
When He wants a [god] or king;
How He reins him and restrains him so his body scarce contains him...
While He fires him and inspires him…
Keeps him yearning, ever burning for that tantalizing goal.
Lures and lacerates his soul...
Sets a challenge for his spirit;
Draws it highest then he's near it!
Makes a jungle that he clear it;
Makes a desert that he fear it...and subdue it, if he can -
So doth God make a man!

To test his spirit's wrath
Throw a mountain in his path;
Puts a bitter choice before him and relentlessly stands o'er him...
Climb or perish, so He says...
But, watch His purpose, watch His ways.
God's plan is wondrous kind - could we understand His mind?
Fools are they who call His blind!

When his feet are torn and bleeding;
Yet his spirit mounts unheeding...
Blazing newer paths and finds;
When the Force that is Divine leaps to challenge every failure,
And His ardour still is sweet -
And love and hope are burning in the presence of defeat!

Lo the crisis, Lo the shouts that would call the leader out...
When the people need salvation doth he rise to lead the nation;
Then doth God show His plan...
And the world has found a man!"



Sunday, 8 February 2009

AI auditions

I like watching the auditions of American Idol because of the intense yet effortless display of the beauty and warmth of the human spirit, as it celebrates and cheers in support of a loved one.

Mist up now and again, I do.


Wednesday, 28 January 2009

"De-inaugurization". Plus, thoughts on a different race run

Ahh. It's over, right? The inauguration of Barack H. Obama as President of the United States of America on January 20, 2009, marking a truly historic moment, is over.

I coined that word at about 1:30AM on January 21 in order to describe the phenomenon of ridding oneself...make that, myself, of the effects of over-exposure to the inauguration, due to over-coverage by media. They just kept going and going - outlasting the Energizer Bunny, I'm sure - and wouldn't let up! I was like, "CNN, you need to go to bed now, so I can stop watching and tapiiiiiing!! I was all over the place: CNN, ABC, NBC, MSNBC, CBS, CBC, BBC, BET, Comedy Central. Ugh! I finally went to bed at 3:20AM, after loading a Monk DVD, hoping it'd be a kind of panacea. (Did I mention that that's my fav show on television? Except that I don't get it here. I used to, when I was living in the US of A. Now, I simply wait until I purchase the latest season on DVD.)

Anyway, that was the effect of the over exposure. I mean, when is enough coverage really enough?

So, President Obama inspires a heck of a lot of hope. And, if you know me, that's a real biggie for me, this hope thing. Yes. Hope is as vital to life as oxygen. Thing is, this hope that is inspired through his accomplishment, should not be misplaced. It shouldn't be placed in President Obama. I believe the President recognizes that it was by the help of God that he accomplished what he did. His and our hope should be built on no other power but God's.

Could you really place your hope in someone whose decision to go from one meeting to the next depended on whether he was having acute diarrhoea? Seriously. My point is that the man is just a man. He seems like a wonderful human being, but, remember, he is just a man.

One of the things that struck me in one of the many still photos of him was just how present he was in that moment in time. Here was the moment for which he had been preparing for a long time, and he was ready. Another thing that struck me was that he looked able. Yes, he was up to the task.

There were previous attempts at Democratic presidential nomination made by civil rights icons. It is not that they were not ready. They might have been ready for that time. History will tell. However, in this particular race (no pun intended), for this particular time, there was a clear need for a certain kind of President. Another African American might have succeeded and done a good job as President. However, the kind of President needed for this time was not one that could simply just do the job of President well. The individual needed to be the kind of President who would takes steps and initiatives, the likes of which had never been seen before, in order to meet the demands of the new world in which we live.

Barack H. Obama's campaign signalled that readiness and the majority of the electorate gave him the opportunity.

I think that had an icon of the civil rights movement run in this election, the tone of the campaign, and the electorate at large, would have been much different. Bad different, too. I can't help but think that theirs would have been a kind of "black come-upance" or "going for the black vote" thing. I look at the distinction between that tone and message and that which was echoed throughout President Obama's campaign. I see his as speaking to the ideals, if you will, of change and hope, to Americans (black and white and in-between) everywhere. Then, oh, by the way, he's black and his assuming the Presidency would be uplifting for African Americans and, by extension, for many black people and other minority groups the world over.

Then, there's the matter of this being a fantastic personal achievement. He must feel good - steering clear of saying proud. And, his wife, First Lady Michelle Obama, along with the girls, must be very proud of him.

Kenneth Burke's position on identification with regard to persuasion, remains so poignant and true for me. In essence, identification is the surest form of persuasion. Across race and ethnicity, people identified with him - this man of bi-racial roots and multi-ethnic background; a world citizen with a brilliant mind.

This may be a point of departure for many, however, as a black person from the Caribbean, I am not able to fully empathize with the African American experience of racial prejudice and segregation. I do not know what it is like to be a part of that reality that discriminates against me based on the colour of my skin. When I was struggling with this idea a few years ago, thinking I needed to apologise to somebody for not feeling 'as black as an African American", I got a bit of help from someone - a Jamaican woman who is now a professor at a University in the US of A. She explained, quite simply, that if it had not been for the struggles and victories of the civil rights movement and all the players therein, I would not be able to enjoy the benefits of America, the fruits of their labour, today. So, I thought about it and have come to realize that during the time of racial segregation and Jim Crow laws, a black person was not asked which country she was coming from. Black is black and the rules applied to whomever the melanin fit. Another professor who writes for The Sunday Gleaner in Jamaica made a point a couple years ago, as well. I read this about a year after my 'couch' experience with the professor in the US of A. I don't recall the topic of the column, or even the main issue of that day. However, I do recall him saying something to the effect that even though he had never experienced the racially charged environment of yester-year in the US of A, he is sensitive to the experiences and reactions of the African Americans. And I thought, by George, I think I've got it!

So, I've pretty much summed it up like this. I might not be able to relate. Yes, we have the histories of slavery, but the segregation laws, and having to abide by them, are not a shared staple of the histories both societies. So, I might not be able to, ok, fully relate. However, I am definitely thankful for the struggle and the resilience and the perseverance of those who made the level of inclusiveness that we experience in this day of 2009 US of A possible.

President Obama took advantage of the possibility that arose out of those struggles and victories, readied himself and now, has stepped up to the responsibility as an able individual. I am not surprised that an African American has attained this position. I'm just glad that it is the likes of a President Barack H. Obama.

I am proud of him for achieving this goal. Our hope is placed in God and I continue to pray for the new President and his family.

Congratulations, Mr. President.


Sunday, 18 January 2009

The pitfalls of ignorance

Took the title from a comment just overheard on a news story on CBC News Sunday, a moment ago. The question was something like, "What should Ottawa avoid?" in relation to the pending Obama administration. There was some talk about NAFTA; the "dirty, dwindling and dangerous" imports from Alberta... Hey, we shall see what we shall see, eh?

So, I wasn't invited to the inauguration on Tuesday. Go figure. I guess, like the billions who will have to settle for live broadcast, I'll be recording this historic occasion.

(Note to self: Coverage of the Presidential Inauguration of Barack H. Obama will begin on Tuesday, January 20, 2009 at 11:00AM.)

Btw, tomorrow, January 19, 2009 will be celebrated in the US of A as Martin Luther King, Jr. Day. The timing could not be any more appropriate; focus has shifted from decades before to a day before.

Got wind of an article in Parade, published January 14, 2009. It's a letter to his daughters from President-elect Barack Obama. Haven't read it yet. S'pose I will.


Thursday, 8 January 2009


It's January 8, 2009! Whoo Hoo!

The highlights of my day? Time spent communing with my Maker this morning, lunch with a new acquaintance and peanut cake.

Like the customs officer said when he greeted his friend the other day as I made my way through CLT: "Every day is a good day!"

I had such a wonderful time with my family during the holidays. Met mah niece and she is, well, let's just say she tends to speak her mind (inverted commas omitted intentionally). I really do hope she grows up with tact and diplomacy - she's gonna need 'em.

Oh! Another thing I did today? Painted my nails Aruba Blue (by Essie).